The Happiest Place on Earth
I am writing this blog from our hotel room in Disneyworld!! :) All our children are home for Thanksgiving, so we decided to take advantage of our time together and celebrate at Disneyworld. Disney is known as the "happiest place on earth" but today I saw otherwise.
For those of you who read my blogs or follow me on social media, you'll know that I LOVE to people watch. I mean really LOVE IT! Today, I have never seen so many crying children and screaming parents. They didn't really seem "happy" in a place known for its happiness. I began thinking about how parenting is the hardest profession on the planet. I mean really hard. I also thought today how blessed and thankful I am that our 3 kids (all grown, or almost grown) are so happy to be with Eugene and I at Disneyworld. They're just as excited for us all to be together, as we are. Nowadays, in the world that we live in, young adult children who actually WANT to hang out with their parents, is a rarity.
We certainly haven't been perfect parents...and we certainly don't have perfect kids but for some reason today, I was able to recognize that all those years of raising young children really do pay off. Today my heart was so happy because I think the real happiest place on earth is when you're able to see some of the fruit of your labor in front of your very eyes.
Moms with young children, here's some encouragement for you from a mom who's now parenting grown children with an entirely different perspective:
(1) Stay strong.
There will be days (MANY days) where your forehead will have to be stronger than your child's forehead. Kids can be strong-willed, and that's ok but you just have to be stronger.
The Bible says, "do not grow weary in well-doing...", and I believe there's not a better "well-doing" than parenting. It's a tough job and not for the faint of heart.
I've told several new moms this past year, "It's amazing how a tiny 7 pound, bundle of precious flesh, can turn two grown adult's lives completely and totally UP-SIDE DOWN." Amazing, isn't it? :)
The encouraging thing is that you're not alone in your parenting. The Bible has ALOT to say about raising children, especially in the book of Proverbs. God is on your side. He's the perfect parent who's just waiting for you to invite Him to join you in the toughest job on earth. Those precious kids of yours? They're not really yours at all but His kids and He has alot to say in how to raise them. Just ask Him.
(2) Grace yourself.
You're going to have good days and bad days...and bad days..and bad days. You'll have one good day for every ten bad days...and it's ok.
You'll not discipline when you should have. And you'll discipline at times when you should not have. You'll yell and even scream on days when you think you're to the end of your rope. You'll ask yourself the question, "why did we ever even have kids?" and then feel so guilty because that question even came to your mind.
It's ok. You have to learn to grace yourself. Why is it that we can extend grace to other people but never extend that same grace to ourselves? As a mother of young children, you'll need alot of extra grace...especially for yourself. You're really a great mom. You're kids cannot tell you that now...but one day they will, and believe me, that day will be one that you'll never forget!
(3) Be consistent.
Don't discipline your children for your lack of consistency. Don't punish them for something that you haven't clearly communicated to them. You have to be consistent! On days that you feel like it and most certainly, on days when you do not...consistency is vital to good parenting. Your children need your consistency.
Do what you say you're going to do. Don't keep threatening your child and then blow up when they don't behave as you've expected them to. Consistency is the key to your child's behavior and to your sanity.
(4) Life is a marathon, not a sprint.
And so it is with parenting...it's a marathon, not a sprint.
You are raising a generation of young people and it's going to take more than a few years to do it. A few mistakes on your end isn't going to ruin their lives. It's not too late to start making the necessary changes in your parenting. You just have to start, though.
Life is about seasons. Some seasons are more pleasant than others. Enjoy the good seasons and stay strong (and consistent) during the hard seasons.
As I looked at our kids today, mostly grown and getting along and loving one another and enjoying and honoring their dad and I, I got to glimpse at some of the fruit of ALL the years and years of "planting" we had done over the YEARS. Not days or weeks or months...but years and years of planting the seeds of godliness, truth, obedience, discipline, honor, standards of God's word and His ways, etc. etc. And the fruit that we are seeing as parents, makes all the seed-planting well worth it!!
It takes time for a seed to grow, for roots to grow strong, for pruning to happen and eventually for fruit to grow. We cannot rush the process. We have to be patient with ourselves, our children and the process of growing up. And as a mother who is on the other side of the season of young kids, I can say with utmost confidence: IT IS A PROCESS. It just takes time and we must have patience as God "completes the work He began" in US and in our children. God will complete it...I promise. But it just takes time.
Where is "The Happiest Place on Earth" really? It's in a mama's heart who see her children rising up and calling her blessed (most days :) and walking out their God-given purpose in this life. There really is no happier place in the world...I promise!!